Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
