with your own penis?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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