YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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