I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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