i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
