please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
