The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
