i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
