yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
