no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
