Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
