Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
whose parrot is this?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
