Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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