who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You're so nebulous sometimes
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Randomize
