come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
