Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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