she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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