Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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