belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
