i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
