i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
