i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
