batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
