what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
