I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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