okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Randomize
