At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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