Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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