We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
