Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
