Dual....:-)
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
