dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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