Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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