Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
