i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
