I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
