When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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