We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
