Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
