do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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