party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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