So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
