whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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