my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
