The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
