In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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