So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
