Got a toothbrush?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
