Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
