doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Randomize
